


closed doors

by myflower



Category: SF9 (Band)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Confessions, Kissing, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-14
Updated: 2017-06-14
Packaged: 2018-11-14 02:08:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,646
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11198232
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/myflower/pseuds/myflower
Summary: He scribbled on a post it note that he left for the dorm and put it on the water machine outside the practice room, where it would inevitably be seen.  He writes that he suddenly felt such a tiredness he couldn’t work through, and that he was going to rest as much as possible.It wasn’t exactly a lie.  He was tired, and he was planning to rest, but after crying his eyes out first because honestly, why would they even do that?  Inseong knew they meant it for fun, but it still hurt more than he cared to admit.Really, maybe he did love Jaeyoon.  Also more than he cared to admit.





	closed doors

**Author's Note:**

  * For [hwiyoung](https://archiveofourown.org/users/hwiyoung/gifts).
  * In response to a prompt by Anonymous in the [SF9Prompts](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/SF9Prompts) collection. 



> sorry if it's rushed.  
> gifted to yi because they've been waiting for my first sf9 fic so here it is!  
> typical jaeseong. i hope ya'll like it.  
> unbeta'd.

Inseong is cute.  That’s a simple fact that cannot be denied.  Not only is he cute, but he’s also extremely hard working, extremely smart, and honestly perfect in every way possible.  He’s bright, funny, patient, loving.  He’s also easy to mess with, which is why he’s often become the center of jokes.  The members like to pick on him without remorse.

It sometimes gets to be too much, but he never lets it show.  Inseong is usually alright with the jokes, they’re fun a lot of the time.  They’re never meant to be harmful, always meant to be lighthearted in every aspect.  But Inseong just couldn’t help it when he started to feel overwhelmed, sometimes to the extent of just wanting to lay in bed and cry and honestly give up on trying to be a hyung, because honestly, he can only take so much before the dam breaks.

 

The first time Inseong feels the joke going too far, the members are joking about how touchy he and Jaeyoon always are.  The entire group is comfortable around each other no matter what, but he and Jaeyoon were an entirely different subject in his mind.  He was used to the jokes from the maknaes about them recognizing “JaeSeong” and living up to the name, but once everyone else started to join picking on him (minus Jaeyoon; the reason this was happening was because he ran to the bathroom) for this thing that he just couldn’t help.  He really liked Jaeyoon, a lot.  He confided in him when he was nervous or scared and they helped keep each other together.  They were stuck together like glue, there was no use separating them.

Youngkyun jokes about how Inseong looks at Jaeyoon, like he wants to kiss him all the time, and how Jaeyoon has the same look, and Inseong can’t just sit around while this is happening.  The members laugh along with Youngkyun, but Inseong quickly gets up to leave.  He slams the door behind him, wanting to cry but unable to as he could still encounter Jaeyoon, and the last thing he wanted to do was worry him.

He scribbled on a post it note that he left for the dorm and put it on the water machine outside the practice room, where it would inevitably be seen.  He writes that he suddenly felt such a tiredness he couldn’t work through, and that he was going to rest as much as possible.

It wasn’t exactly a lie.  He was tired, and he was planning to rest, but after crying his eyes out first because honestly, why would they even do that?  Inseong knew they meant it for fun, but it still hurt more than he cared to admit.

Really, maybe he did love Jaeyoon.  Also more than he cared to admit.

 

The second time Inseong feels the joke going too far, it’s a week and a half later and he’s sitting against the wall of the practice room.  He’s overwhelmed trying to get oxygen into his system, the humid room making it difficult.  It was their official thirty minute break time, at midnight sharp, before three more hours and then going home, only to sleep for three or four hours before getting up once more.  Inseong suddenly catches his breath, turning to face Jaeyoon, who’s sat himself next to him.  Jaeyoon puts his hand out, smiling, and Inseong takes it, only meaning a high five but he’s a little (weirdly) shocked when Jaeyoon’s hand closes on his.  It’s only natural for him to close his hand as well, pretend he’s not as shocked as he was.  Jaeyoon moves a little closer to Inseong, and lays his head on the older’s shoulder.  He’s clearly tired, and while Inseong would rather not have any more body heat at the moment, it’s okay because it’s Jaeyoon.  He could deal with it because it’s Jaeyoon.

Before he knows it, though, Jaeyoon’s started to fall asleep on his shoulder, holding his hand, his other hand pushed across his lap and dangerously close to touching Inseong’s thigh, and Inseong  _ notices,  _ especially when he’d rather not.

He looks up from their little setup to glance around the room, finding Sanghyuk and Youngkyun staring at them, giggling a bit.  Chanhee makes little glances now and then, and eventually tells Youngbin of the events as well.  Their leader smiles a bit, but has this devilish joking look in his eyes, like he just can’t wait to make fun of them.  Taeyang pretended to ignore the situation and tried to change the subject, as Juho and Seokwoo would suddenly not stop talking about it.

Inseong removes himself from these images to look at Jaeyoon again.  He wants to wake him up and take him to the dorm with him, since he’s clearly tired, but he doesn’t want to wake him either; he looks so peaceful and beautiful and Inseong really just wants to stare at him forever.

He wasn’t intending on waking him up, but he would inevitably anyway.  Inseong removes himself from Jaeyoon’s grasp and tries desperately to get him on his back as quickly as possible.  Jaeyoon stirs as his chin lays on Inseong’s shoulder and his legs wrap around his waist.  He doesn’t open his eyes, but he’s awake.

Youngbin asks what they’re doing, where they’re going, and Inseong simply answers, “I’m taking him to the dorm. He’s too tired.”

He doesn’t let Youngbin say anything more as they make it out the door and Jaeyoon loosely wraps his arms around Inseong’s neck.

“You didn’t have to do that,” he says, and Inseong exhales in a way that clearly says, yes, yes I did, and Jaeyoon is a tired kind of quiet for the rest of his piggy-back ride.

They reached the dorm quicker than they expected to, considering Jaeyoon would be a factor that wasn’t beneficial to his speed.  But just before 12:30, they reached the front door, and Inseong let him down as he scrambled for the keys.

“Thank you,” he hears Jaeyoon say, just as he finds which key he needed for the dorm.

“Of course,” Inseong replies, not thinking about his proximity with Jaeyoon and only about getting in the dorm.

He opens the door quickly, and Jaeyoon immediately walks in.  As he closes the door, he’s met with Jaeyoon’s hand once more, this time on his neck, and  _ holy shit _ , he’s a six inches in front of Inseong and staring directly at his lips.  Inseong thinks this is a dream, but Jaeyoon leans in and Inseong closes his eyes and Jaeyoon kisses him with a smile on his lips.

It’s quick and sweet, but meaningful, so, so meaningful, and Inseong gets multiple surges of goosebumps.  He wants to continue kissing Jaeyoon.  He really does.  But he knows what that could lead to, so he holds himself back.

“I love you,” he hears Jaeyoon say, before Jaeyoon removes himself from the room and leaves him in the kitchen alone.

 

The third time Inseong feels the joke going too far, he tells them immediately, and starts to cry.

Of course, the joke is about him and Jaeyoon again, and Jaeyoon himself is confused when Inseong starts to tear up.

Inseong yells, overwhelmingly so, surprising all of the members as he goes on about how important Jaeyoon is to him and he’s tired of acting like all of it’s some big show and tired of all the members acting like all of it’s some big joke.

He feels Jaeyoon grab his arm, and he immediately stops his rant to look at him directly in the eyes, and god, Inseong has never felt he had love for anyone more than the love that he has for Jaeyoon.

His eyes are soft and forgiving and hopeful, and Inseong immediately falls into them, calming himself down within a second.  He takes a deep breath and lets a smile tug on his lips a bit, Jaeyoon smiling at him entirely.

The rest of them suddenly feel guilty, though.  They didn’t realize how big of a problem they caused, and they collectively went to hug Inseong.

“We really love you, hyung!” Chanhee says, squeezing Inseong’s waist.  He sees Youngkyun look especially guilty, and he feels bad, he didn’t mean to make them feel like this for it.  They didn’t know how Inseong felt, how could they have?  He never expressed it to them that he was somewhat annoyed the times they joked about his relationship with Jaeyoon, the prying eyes and joking smiles too much to endure.

“I’m sorry,” Youngkyun says, quietly, but despite all the noise of apologies, Inseong hears him first, and says that it’s okay, that he just needed to get everything off of his chest that was bothering him, and especially that it wasn’t Youngkyun’s fault.

Sanghyuk apologizes too, and after that, Inseong yells over the voices saying that if anyone else says sorry he’s ready to dropkick them.  They all laugh and honestly, quickly shut up thereafter.

Jaeyoon is still holding on to Inseong’s arm.  He asks Inseong to go for a quick walk as Youngbin calls break an extra twenty minutes, and he accepts.

 

“Did you mean all of that?” Jaeyoon asks as they’re walking around the company building, and Inseong laughs a bit at the question, as if it wasn’t obvious.

“Why would I just say it if it weren’t true?” Inseong responds, and Jaeyoon is oddly silent.  They make their way around the corner where the group usually enters the building.

“Can I kiss you again?”

Inseong doesn’t even respond, he turns to face Jaeyoon and immediately meets their lips together.

This one, while still sweet, is a little less so.  It’s more filled with unsaid words and emotions, and Inseong can’t get enough.

He really, really loves Jaeyoon.

Inseong knew he'd be okay if he always had him.

**Author's Note:**

> comments keep me motivated.  
> talk to me on twitter @ultgwanghyun
> 
> ngl. inseong is lowkey me when it comes to jaeyoon


End file.
